So I write tonight to discuss an emerging field of science which is known as bonergineering. It seems that most people start to manufacture their boners during hikes schools and college, but some people try to seek out their first bones later in life; it seems that for these people match.com is a place that can satisfy these desires. I have officially joined match.com.
Let me tell how you can fuck up your match.com situation before you ever start; it seems that women are retarded. I am a simple man and I put forward this in my outlook for new lovers. I am looking for an average looking white/latina (latino is the new white) 21-26 year old woman who has some amazing things to say about herself. I attest that a single line of my profile is better and more revealing than an entire profile written by one of these normal retards. Anywho, I would like to meet a girl who has a college degree or is finishing one and preferably one who likes real comedy and alcohol and sex, but that would be an ideal woman. It is interesting to me that I am looking for a persona that could be satisfied by a number of women, but none of them are biting. You can also do a "reverse" search which will show you all the women who are looking for people who satisfy the criteria that they want in a mate. Here are some numbers; when I search for women based on my criteria of basically any woman who is 21-26 and has no kids I get 9 pages of hits, but when I look for the type of women who are looking for a guy like me, I see nearly double as many women. Where is the breakdown?
It seems that the modern woman is lying to herself. In a brutally honest world, the Saw is even more honest and yet these women don't seem to be. They must be willing to compromise in some way, although I think choosing me to bone them is not a compromise, but rather a huge boon to their self esteem. I wonder what they are looking for? I did a search for the guys on match.com and I saw something immediately that I did not expect; all of the guys are skydivers. The first several dude I saw all had pictures of them skydiving. These guys didn't have anything to offer other than their wildness, but that is what these women want (is it?). I think they want to see a guy who is out of control, but one who they could make into a nice guy. Bullshit.
So I decided that the best way to convince these hobags that I am legit is to manufacture photos of myself. Experiment: go to best buy and buy a point and shoot camera, take photos of social situations that may be premeditated, enhance bonerbility. I hope to post some new flattering pics of myself on match.com to see if I can snag some pooner. We'll see what happens.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
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I would identify your weight as average, that way you won't be limited by search engines.
ReplyDeleteI would get a new picture as soon as possible.
Unless you think that the perfect woman is out there searching profiles and hoping to find a whimsical photo of a man in a silly hat at steak and shake.
You should probably go skydiving, or atleast photoshop yourself on a dude skydiving.
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